MT5: More Than Hopeless
by Elise Marie
Summary: Jack and Sam have finally decided to move on in their life together, but now Jack's left holding their baby and trying to find out exactly where in the universe Sam has been taken. If she's ever found, will they be able to live happily ever after? 13chaps
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: More Than Hopeless

**Category**: Sam and Jack romance/angst

**Spoilers/Season:** Set after 7.03 Fragile Balance and a few weeks after the final chapter of More Than Mini. This series of stories now exists in an AU spinning off after Entity. 5th in the More Than series and one week after MT4. Contains a flashback and slight re-write of "Metamorphosis".

**Rating**: PG13

**Content Warnings:** Maybe a bit of AngryJack so language, descriptions of torture and suggestions of other nasty situations, nothing too graphic.

**Summary:** Jack and Sam have finally decided to move on in their life together, but now Jack's left holding their baby and trying to find out exactly where in the universe Sam has been taken. If she's ever found, will they be able to live happily ever after?

**Disclaimer: Stargate and SG-1 are the property of Showtime, MGM, Double Secret and Gekko and they do not belong to the author. This piece of fan-fiction was created solely for entertainment purposes and no money was exchanged. No copyright infringement was intended and the original characters, situations and plots are property of the author. This piece of fan-fiction must not be archived without the author's consent.**

**Comments:** I, apparently, wrote this in November 2003 but only by hand and then completely forgot about it. I found it in my attic in 2010 and decided to share it with the world, but I have re-written it for first posting in 2010 and am now editing for 2011 because I have finished More Than Mini.

Copyright © Elise November 2003

Edited and Published September 2010

Re-edited and Re-published 2011.

**More Than Hopeless**

"Come on, baby, ssh, please stop crying," Jack pleaded with the toddler in his arms. His pleads were drowned out by his daughter's cries and she continued to get hotter and redder with each wail. He had no idea how to calm her as he had already tried everything at his disposal. Never had he felt so completely useless in his role as a father, but the little girl knew that there was a problem. Sam had joked that the only reason she had worked so hard to find Jack after he had 'disappeared' with Maybourne to a paradise moon was to calm their daughter. Daniella knew that Jack was not calm and that her mother should be around. Jack continued trying to calm her even though he knew deep down that the only thing she wanted was her mother.

"I'll take her, Jack," Janet Fraiser said and Jack relinquished his daughter immediately. He knew that his own level of stress was not helping matters and that anyone other than he would do a better job of calming her.

It had been over a week since SG-1's mission to P6X 2AE and the capture of Sam by Osiris. With Daniel, Teal'c and Lieutenant Carpenter, Jack had left P6X to return to Earth and get re-enforcements. Unfortunately they had no leads and General Hammond had hesitated in allowing any teams back to P6X. That had not stopped Jack from shouting at General Hammond that he should be allowed to go through the Stargate. It had been Daniel that had calmed him down, telling him that Teal'c would go with the other SG teams to see if there were any clues on P6X and it had been Carpenter who had reminded him that his daughter needed him. Jack had watched, helplessly, from the Briefing room with Daniel as two SG teams, Teal'c and Carpenter had returned to P6X. Jack refused to leave the base as he wanted to be ready should he be needed. Daniel had tried to convince him to go home; to shower and change, maybe see his daughter. Jack had told Daniel to bring Daniella to the base which he had done.

Jack was glad that he had Daniella near him, in his quarters on base, because he needed to have a part of Sam close by, but he knew that it was not the best place for her. If the toddler were at home she would be in her normal environment which Jack did not doubt would comfort her. She would also have her live-in Nanny, Sasha, who was the only true constant in the girl's life. Sam had never been away from her daughter for this long, Jack knew, just as he knew that Daniella also knew. In that respect, Jack wished that Daniella was at home with Sasha and that he was off world doing something. Not that any member of the SGC were off world searching for Sam anymore as there simply were no leads to go on and Sam was now the proverbial needle in the universe sized haystack. They had put out feelers to their contacts with the Tok'ra and Jaffa resistance. Jack knew that as soon as Jacob heard of Sam's capture, he would be here. There was not much else that they could do as they had no idea where Osiris was or what she was planning.

Just as Jack realised that Daniella had ceased crying, the alert system activated. "Off world activation!" Jack turned to Janet and Cassie who were sitting on the floor playing with Daniella and some toys. Janet nodded at him and he smiled his thanks as he ran from the room towards the control room. He ran up the stairs leading straight into the control room and came to a stop directly in front of the window. He was acutely aware of SG-1, Hammond and some technicians nearby, but all that he could concentrate on was the active Stargate.

"Receiving Tok'ra IDC."

Jack watched intently as the iris opened. He had never been a patient man and it seemed that in the past week he had lost more and more of what little patience he had. Finding time slowing as no one actually stepped through the 'gate, all Jack could do was guess at why the Tok'ra were visiting and who it would be travelling in their group. He hoped that it was Jacob arriving with the full force of the Tok'ra intelligence to help locate and rescue his daughter. Or he hoped that Jacob had already rescued Sam and they were both going to walk through the shimmering blue in a moment. Jack was happily considering any possibility, no matter how ridiculous. He would entertain any thought in his mind just to make this situation seem a little less hopeless.

He released his held breath when two figures finally emerged from the Stargate - Jacob Carter/Selmak and Anise/Freya. The Stargate disengaged behind them and they both silently walked down the ramp. The pair soon arrived in the control room.

"Jacob," Hammond greeted with a polite smile.

"George, I came as soon as Anise found me." He paused slightly ominously. "Where's my daughter, George?" Last Jack had known, the Tok'ra had given Jacob a few weeks of downtime after a series of long undercover missions, but he had returned to another classic Tok'ra operation; he was surprised that the human-Tok'ra had been found so quickly.

"She was on P6X 2AE," Hammond explained. Jack was sure that Jacob must already be aware of what happened and that he just wanted to hear it from the source. "When Osiris attacked."

"Well, who was with her?" Jacob demanded.

"All of SG-1."

Jacob turned towards Jack, almost ignoring the other members of SG-1. "What happened?"

"Osiris turned up and took her saying something about a plan. What do you know?"

"How could you let her be taken?" Jacob shouted.

"It was just she and I there when it happened," Jack explained in an aggravated tone. He wanted to know what information Jacob had brought with him because surely he must know something.

"And you had no weapons?"

"It all happened too quickly. Osiris appeared out of nowhere and Sam was down before I even knew about it. Osiris said it had plans for Sam and that it might spare me. She knocked me out with the damn hand device and fled before I could do anything or request back-up. I think it used Asgard beaming technology." Jack admitted, but he was not about to admit to Sam's father that they had been in the process of arguing and that Sam had 'gated to the planet without authorisation and without a full weapons complement. He considered himself grateful that General Hammond had not mentioned that element of the story since Sam had been taken.

"So you just let Osiris take her?" Jacob demanded, his voice still had a harsh tone, but his shout was not quite as loud as it had been.

"This is not my fault and don't dare try and pin the blame on me. I've been trying to do something for the past week. Where have you been? Not here helping look for your daughter."

"And what good has being here done?" Jacob asked. "At least I've been out there trying to find information. What have you managed to find out?"

"I've been here," Jack snarled, "looking after my daughter, your grand-daughter, so don't question what I've been doing."

"Oh, I can question what you've been doing if I choose to and I'd like to question your actions for the past three years."

"Gentlemen," Anise interjected, "we do have some news." Everyone turned to look at Anise, except for Jacob who kept his eyes on Jack.

"If I find out you did anything wrong," he warned before copying everyone else and turning to Anise.

"Colonel O'Neill, you said that Osiris knew of SG-1's mission to P6X 2AE and that she was expecting Major Carter?"

"Uh-huh," Jack nodded, glancing briefly at Jacob. Now was not the right time for him to admit that Osiris had originally been upset at thinking Sam was not there. It had originally been Sam's command, until Carpenter had requested to remain on base working and, as a one off, Hammond had agreed to let Jack and Sam on the mission. When Jack had decided that he wanted to try and alter his relationship with Sam, he had covertly kicked her off the mission and then requested Carpenter personally.

"We believe that Osiris had this information due to a member of the SGC telling her."

"What, like a spy?" Daniel asked.

Anise shook her head because things were never that simple. "We believe someone here may be a Zatarc."

SG – SG – SG


	2. Chapter 2

Teal'c knocked on the door and opened it without waiting for anyone to allow him entrance. Inside the room were Colonel Jack O'Neill, Daniel Jackson, Doctor Fraiser, Cassandra and Daniella. Teal'c inclined his head slightly as greeting. "Colonel O'Neill, Anise has requested you."

"For crying out loud, T! I'm not a damn Zanex thing."

"Zatarc," Teal'c corrected and he was rewarded with a 'look' from O'Neill.

"Jack, come on. We're all being tested," Daniel Jackson reasoned. "There is a strong possibility that someone on this base is a Zatarc. Testing everyone and finding them could lead us to Sam or at least give us some leverage over them to find out something."

"Clearly the Tok'ra have no other possibilities to follow," Teal'c added.

"What about Bra'tac and the Jaffa?" O'Neill asked Teal'c hopefully. Teal'c shook his head because the last that he had heard from Bra'tac was that they had no information on Osiris or Major Carter. Whilst O'Neill had not been entirely truthful in front of Anise and General Carter, he had told everyone else exactly what had happened on P6X and Teal'c was sure that he laid a large proportion of the blame on his own shoulders. Teal'c understood O'Neill's reluctance to remain on Earth and merely be tested. Both men were warriors, men of action and Teal'c would rather be on another planet, gathering information rather than sitting on Earth doing nothing and feeling helpless. Daniel Jackson was correct that testing the base for a Zatarc was the only course of action to take. "It's just," Jack mumbled, "that Anise and Zatarcs is where all this began. I wasn't a Zatarc then and I know I'm not one now."

"Jack," Daniel started hesitantly, "does your reluctance have anything to do with the fact that you're going to have be one hundred per cent honest? With Jacob and General Hammond in the room?"

Teal'c had been present on P6X when Major Carter had announced that she and O'Neill had been intimate once more within the past few weeks. Being aware that not only was this against regulations but that Earth fathers frowned upon such things, Teal'c could understand O'Neill's reluctance.

"You heard Jacob! He's going to blame me as much as I already blame myself for treating Sam how I did. If I'd have done things differently, Sam wouldn't have been in that position."

"I disagree," Teal'c commented. "Osiris was expecting Major Carter on that mission and so would have attacked anyway. If you had not rearranged the mission and removed Major Carter from it, she would have been on that planet. As it stood, Major Carter's arrival on the planet was completely of her own doing. And if Major Carter is part of Osiris' plan, she would have tried again after a failure."

"I don't think Jacob's going to see it that way, do you?" he asked sarcastically.

"Jack, you have to do it," Daniel prompted.

"The General will court martial me and then Jacob will kill me."

"That is highly doubtful," Teal'c suggested, opening the door and indicating that O'Neill should follow him. "I believe Jacob Carter will kill you before General Hammond can begin the paperwork."

"Thanks for that, T."

SG – SG – SG 


	3. Chapter 3

Jack entered the large medical room where the Zatarc detector was set up. Nothing had changed in the room since the last time he had been in here for the same reason. Jack was sure that the walls had been painted and the floor might have been re-laid because most of the base had been at some point or another, but it was hardly obvious. Standing by the machine were Anise and Jacob, both ready to analyse whatever he responded and see if he was lying, or if he was, in fact, a Zatarc who had betrayed his planet and led to Sam's capture. General Hammond and Doctor Fraiser were above the room in the observation room, watching everything occurring beneath them. Jack had sat up there on many occasions, watching helplessly at the medical trouble which normally occurred in this room. Wishing that the General were not watching, Jack could only hope that questions stayed away from his relationship with Sam. The last time he and SG-1 had undergone Zatarc testing, it had set into motion the changes that were still deeply affecting the team. Jack had to admit that he was nervous and it was not because there was a possibility that he was a Zatarc. He knew that he was not a spy for the Goa'uld. There was no way that he could ever do anything to endanger Sam. Jack knew that no matter what technology the Goa'uld used on him, he would never allow Sam to be captured for some greater plan. No, Jack was nervous at undergoing what was going to be career-damaging testing because it was not just his C.O. watching him, but it was because Jacob Carter was watching. He really did not want to have his relationship questioned in front of his boss, Sam's father, Sam's best friend and the Tok'ra that once admitted to having a crush on him. There could have been better choices for an audience. Knowing that if he was questioned about his relationship with Sam, he would have to tell the truth which Jack did not want to do not only because of his audience, but he had not yet been able to fully discuss it all with Sam.

At least there was Teal'c. Jack smiled at the friendly Jaffa before taking the seat. Teal'c had his Zat weapon ready and Jack knew that if he truly were responsible for Sam's abduction he could never live with the fact. Teal'c was the only person he trusted to do it. Anyone else would pause, as he had when Sam had been taken over by the electrical entity. Anise approached and placed the headband over Jack's head before proceeding to the other restraints. When she placed the memory recall device on his head, Jack did not even register the pain.

"You remember how this works, Colonel?" she asked as she walked back to the monitor. Jack noticed the scowl on Jacob's face. He really did not want to have to undergo this testing with Jacob playing over-protective father.

"Yeah," he said as he tried to nod his head. "Can we just get this over with, please?"

"Of course, Colonel." Anise pressed some buttons and then said, "Colonel, has there been any time in the recent past where you could have been alone with a Goa'uld?"

"Yes."

"When?"

Jack searched his mind, trying to remember the details that Anise and her machine would need. "The Goa'uld was Nirti and we were all prisoners with her genetic freaks. I don't remember the planet designation or exact date." Anise nodded to him that those details did not matter and that he should continue. Jack sighed at the pointlessness of this charade. "It was SG-1 - Danny, Teal'c," he paused on her name, "Carter and me." He hoped that by referring to her as Carter did not screw up the machine, but he did not want to give anything away to the two generals in the room that their relationship was in the process of altering. "We were in pairs in cells with the poor freaks in cells around us. Nirti wanted to know what she could make us do..."

_Flashback_

Jack watched as Wodan and Eggar walked towards the cell. Wodan was dragging someone and although Jack could not see from his current position, he could only hope that it was Carter as she had been taken by them over an hour ago. As Wodan and Eggar approached the door to their cell, Jack shook his head at his other two team-mates. Daniel visibly relaxed at this 'stand-down' order, but Teal'c appeared no different. Wodan pushed his prisoner roughly into the cell and remained standing where he was, blocking the exit. Jack went straight over to Carter and rolled her over onto her back, checking her vitals. From his position, Jack could see the beads of sweat on her forehead. He forced his eyes back on Wodan and away from the injured Sam. He had no idea what tests Nirti had done on her or what alterations to her DNA the Goa'uld had done, but the more Jack thought about it the angrier he got. Now was not the right time to try and escape, however, so Jack tried his hardest to keep his cool. They had already witnessed Nirti's tests going wrong when both Alebran and Lieutenant Colonel Evanov had suddenly liquefied. There was no point in trying to escape for Sam to liquefy at a later point. Jack had no idea how he would ever explain that to their daughter. Maybe Sam would just develop a super-cool power instead.

"You!" Eggar demanded, pointing at Daniel.

Jack stood to take his place, but Teal'c said, "O'Neill." Saying his name alone was enough for Jack to stand down. Daniel stood after a nod from Jack and left the cell without hassle from the guards. Once the mutants and Daniel had disappeared from view, Jack looked at Carter who was still lying on the floor and sweating, but her eyes were now open. Looking at Teal'c, Jack questioned his actions with a look. "If we are to attempt a break-out or take-over, you and I need to remain fittest, O'Neill. I do not believe that Nirti's machine will work upon me. My symbiote should prevent it. Our chances are greater with you still capable."

Nodding, Jack knew that Teal'c was correct, but it did not change his stance that he was not leaving if there was a chance of Carter washing away. Carefully Jack approached Carter on the floor and bent down next to her. "Hey," he said quietly. "You okay?" He gently touched her shoulder and she nodded at him. "Let's get you up," he said as he slowly helped her to sit up. She winced slightly and Jack had no idea what she was feeling. He hoped that he would not find out later. He held her, helping her over to the bench/bed on which he had been sitting. Helping her sit down, Jack then sat down next to her and allowed her to lean her head against his shoulder. Jack then glanced up at Teal'c who purposefully looked away at the comfort and intimacy on display. After a long few moments, Carter spoke.

"Colonel," she whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I'm scared."

"Whatever Nirti's done to you, we'll find a way to reverse it and get you home."

"What if we can't reverse it?"

"We will. Unless Nirti gave you some amazing super-hero power. Then you can keep it and Dani will have the coolest mom ever."

"I miss her."

Jack nodded and stroked her cheek with his free hand. "If I could bargain with Nirti right now to get you home, I'd give her anything she asked."

"Don't say that," Carter pleaded.

"Why not? It's the truth," he whispered before glancing at Teal'c who was still giving the appearance that he was not aware of anything.

"It's not just Nirti," she whispered. "There's someone else here. I can sense them."

"In here or when you were with Nirti?" Jack asked and Teal'c began looking into the other cells.

"Everywhere."

"O'Neill," Teal'c warned and Jack followed his eyes. Approaching the cell was a Jaffa. Carefully, Jack moved Carter and stood opposite Teal'c and both in front of the door to their cells. The Jaffa's emblem was burnt off, making Jack immediately think him to be a free Jaffa who was maybe on a rescue mission. Teal'c moved his head almost imperceptibly side to side indicating to Jack that the Jaffa was not a free one.

"Tau'ri," the Jaffa bellowed, "the woman will come with me."

O'Neill took another step closer to the door, blocking the Jaffa's passage to Carter. "Take me instead." There had been no indication of Nirti having many Jaffa which would be accounted for by the fact that she was an outcast. This Jaffa must be from some other Goa'uld and that greatly concerned Jack. He did not need a Goa'uld taking Sam, preventing any cure to her genetic mutations.

"My master has asked for the female."

"Who is your master, maybe I can talk to them?"

The Jaffa smirked at Jack before quickly getting his Zat out and firing shots at all three of them.

_End Flashback_

"... And I blacked out."

Anise nodded and Jack naively assumed that meant everything was okay so far. "What happened next, Colonel?"

"I woke up in a different cell. It looked like a Goa'uld mother ship, but I didn't see any of the rest of the place so can't tell you anything more. Carter was lying on the floor on the opposite side of the room to me. T wasn't there." Teal'c and Anise nodded in confirmation. "I went over to her and woke her up. She wasn't sweating anymore and we later found out that whatever Nirti had done to her, had been reversed. Just as I helped her to her feet, two Jaffa arrived." Jack paused. This was the start of the hard part. To describe what he needed to describe in front of Sam's father was not something he had ever wanted to do. "They began torturing us. They each used the glow stick thing, the pain stick on us." He could remember the pain incredibly vividly. "All I could hear was her screaming."

"Where you ever separated?" Anise asked.

Jack shrugged as much as was possible in his restraints. "I don't know," he answered honestly. "We could have been separated before we got to that cell, or during the torture. She passed out before I did, but not much before. I saw her," he said quietly and meeting Jacob's eyes for the first time, "on the floor unconscious as my eyes closed. I... I wasn't sure if she were dead or alive."

"What were you thinking, Colonel?"

Unable to look at the pain in Jacob's eyes, Jack resumed staring at the wall. "I was afraid for her," he admitted. "As I passed out all I could think was that anything could happen to her without me awake to protect her."

"Would you think that no matter who was trapped with you?" Anise asked trying to clear up something on his test.

"No, not to the same extent."

"Did any of the Jaffa say anything to either of you?"

"No."

"Did you meet the Goa'uld?"

"No, not as far as I remember." They had still not learnt who the Goa'uld had been and it was still a complete mystery as to why they had even been taken and tortured.

"What happened after you awoke, Colonel?" 


	4. Chapter 4

_"What happened after you awoke, Colonel?"_

_Flashback_

"Oh, God!" he groaned in pain. His body felt as if every muscle fibre was on fire, the normal for post pain-stick torture. Jack did not think it a good thing that he could link 'torture' and 'normal'. He only wanted the concept of 'normal' to link to his daughter and being at home. At that moment, Jack could not think of anything he wanted more than to go home, have a shower, feel human and spend time with his daughter. The Jaffa had not seemed to want anything from him and they had been intent with just hearing him scream. He had obliged them. He remembered falling to the floor, his face inches away from Carter's as he had looked at her. Her eyes had been closed and he could not tell from the distance if she were breathing or not. He had fought to not close his eyes, but there had been blackness. "Carter?" he whispered hoarsely. Opening his eyes, Jack saw her sitting on the opposite side of their Goa'uld cell.

"Colonel, you're awake."

Jack struggled to sit, groaning and wincing as he did. Nodding once he was comfortably sitting, Jack instantly regretted it when pain and nausea washed over him. "You okay?"

"Yeah." She was holding something back from him; Jack hoped that it was just the level of her pain. He remembered how she had been lying on the floor completely defenceless and how the Jaffa had grinned at her.

"Are you hurt?" he asked as delicately as he could.

She smiled at him, understanding his meaning. "Just a few scrapes and bruises. I don't think there are any internal injuries." They both sat in silence for a few minutes until Carter asked, "What happened after I passed out?"

"They tortured me a bit more and then I joined you in sleeping."

"They never asked me anything. I don't think that the Jaffa wanted any information from either of us."

"I've got no idea what they're up to," Jack admitted. "Do you think it could be Anubis?"

Sam shrugged her shoulders. "At least we haven't gone into hyper-speed at any point whilst we've been awake."

Jack had not even considered anything that far beyond their surroundings. He had figured that their situation was already pretty bad. They had been captured by a banished Goa'uld and then stolen by another Goa'uld. He was not sure there was much else that could go wrong. They remained in silence whilst Jack still tried to block out the residual pain in his body.

Suddenly from her position, Carter sobbed, "I want my daughter."

Jack carefully stood and moved across the room, resting next to her on the floor. He pulled Carter into a hug, trying to mind any of their injuries. Knowing that she would not break down in front of any other officer, Jack knew exactly how she was feeling. "Carter, I already told you - we're gonna get home."

Sam pulled away slightly so that she could look at him. Her eyes were wet and tears had spilled down over her cheeks. "Don't you ever worry that we won't?"

He looked away from her, unwilling to admit that he did sometimes have doubts about returning home to his family and that it did sometimes scare him. He had to make her believe that they would both be fine because they both needed to be strong to make it through this. Cupping her face he stared into her eyes. "We will get home," he promised. "We will both see Dani again."

"Colonel-" she tried to object, but he interrupted her.

"No, Carter, we will. And we'll go on with our lives. We're not ready to give up yet. Do I make myself clear?"

"What if I want to give up?" she asked. "What if I want our lives to change, to prevent this anymore and just be a family?"

He shook his head despite the pain. "You can't. I won't let you. I..." He turned away and leant against the cool wall. "Your brain's too important to the SGC." He put his arm around her and pulled her against him so they could both rest. "We'll get out of here, alright?"

She nodded against his chest and he allowed her to rest while he fought slumber to remain her protector.

_End Flashback_

"Colonel O'Neill," Teal'c warned.

Jack looked at the Jaffa and sighed in annoyance. "Let me guess," Jack asked sarcastically, "the machine believes I'm a Zatarc because I'm not admitting my feelings? Deja vu." He did not expect a reply so he continued. "I couldn't have her give up. I need her with me. At work and at home."

"Why?"

Just prior to Sam being taken by Osiris they had been discussing their relationship and their feelings for each other. He could not believe that he was now about to admit what they had not finished discussing to everyone else and not her. "Because I love her," he finally admitted, "but it's not that simple." He paused again still staring at the grey wall in front of him and trying to ignore that there was anyone else in the room at all. "It was too big a risk because of SG-1 and, even now with our joint command, it's too big a risk for our family."

Anise nodded again, indicating that his admission was satisfactory. Jack still refused to look at anyone other than occasionally glancing at Teal'c. "What then, Colonel?" she asked.

"Daniel, Teal'c and a bunch of other SG teams rescued us a day or two later. We didn't see the Jaffa or anyone else in that time so needless to say we were starving. Danny said there was no sign of anyone and that Nirti was dead. We went home." Jack risked a look at Anise and saw her whispering something to Jacob, who was purposefully not looking at Jack. He risked a glance up at his general and Fraiser. Part of him considered maybe it would be better to be a Zatarc so that he could receive some sympathy from General Hammond and maybe escape a court martial.

"Thank you, Colonel," Anise smiled. "You are not a Zatarc."

"I could've told ya that!" he replied as Teal'c undid his hand restraints. Jack then removed his own head restraint and stood up. "Who's next then?"

"Doctor Jackson," Anise replied, but Jack was no longer interested in the answer. He was watching as Harriman spoke to General Hammond in the observation room. Jack watched as Hammond nodded and then leaned forward to the microphone.

"Aldwin is here, Jacob. He has news for us." As soon as the words left General Hammond's mouth, everyone in the room moved quickly towards the embarkation room. Within a minute, Jack, Hammond, Jacob, Daniel, Teal'c, Anise and Fraiser were all standing in front of Aldwin and each had a demanding look upon their face.

"You bring news?" Selmak asked of the younger Tok'ra. Jack had no idea how he knew when it was Jacob and when it was Selmak, but he assumed that Selmak had been in control for a lot of the Zatarc testing.

Aldwin nodded and Jack's stomach plummeted in fear. "We finally received word from our Tok'ra operative on board Osiris' Ha'tak."

"And?" Jacob demanded, overpowering his symbiote.

"Hang on," Jack objected, "you have an operative aboard Osiris' ship? Where are they? Why didn't you say anything? We should already be on the damn thing!" He was completely astounded that Jacob had known and had been keeping it from everyone. Figuring that it was just another instance Jack was able to chalk up to how the Tok'ra hid everything from their allies.

"Jack," Jacob said in an attempt to pacify him. "It's not that simple. We can't make contact with our operative and have had to wait for them to contact us. Which they have now done."

"What?" Jack asked incredulously. He stepped closer to Jacob. "You must have an idea where they are. We could have done something already."

"No, we couldn't. This is my daughter, Jack, I care about her too. We cannot just go rushing in. That might be the plan Osiris told you of."

"Screw the 'it might be a trap' excuse, Jacob. This is your one and only daughter, I'd do anything for Daniella. Who knows what's happening to her. If you weren't a general," he threatened through gritted teeth.

"You'd do what?" Jacob goaded.

"Excuse me," Anise interjected and moved in-between the two angry men. "But if we listen to what Aldwin has to say, we may receive the information needed to mount a rescue mission." Jack glanced at the female Tok'ra and stepped back before glancing at everyone else who appeared to be slightly shocked at his temper.

Everyone's eyes then turned to Aldwin. "Our operative managed to send just a brief message. Osiris' has switched hosts."

"What happened to Sarah?" Daniel asked.

"Where is Osiris?" Jack demanded.

Aldwin continued looking directly at Jacob, a great sadness in his eyes. "Osiris has taken a new host." Everyone knew what Aldwin was going to say next. "It is Major Carter."

SG – SG – SG


	5. Chapter 5

I'm Samantha Carter and I'm a prisoner. I've been one before, too many times to count actually, but this is only the second time I've been a prisoner quite like this. I can hear, see and think. I can feel myself move, hear myself speak, but I'm trapped. I see things move in front of me and then realise after a few beats that the hand or foot is mine because I have no control. I can only watch helplessly as 'lowly' townspeople or incompetent Jaffa kneel before me and a beam of yellow energy hits them. The energy comes from within me and I feel it flood through and out of my body. It doesn't cause me pain and I think it causes my kidnapper pleasure. I see the pain in the eyes of whomever I hurt. I see their fear.

Worst of all, I see my own reflection. I see me and yet it isn't me. I've never felt so disgusted to see myself. I've never felt so disgusted to be me. She taunts me because she knows I hate my own reflection. I can see joy and power reflected to me and the horrific yellow glow of my eyes.

I'm a prisoner within my own body and she mocks me for it. She knows how scared I am and how angry I am. I hate what she's made my body do and what she's undoubtedly going to do. I hate her for the people she's made me kill, for the people she's made me use. She even killed someone by strangling them with my hands just so that I could feel what it was like: my skin on theirs as their heart stopped beating and I could no longer feel the pulse against my hands. I screamed at her, but no one else heard except her. She hears all of my objections. She taunts me by doing what I hate and find disgusting. I think she's killed more people in the past few days than normal just to make me suffer. It's just fun for her, making me beg for someone else's freedom. She thinks it's pathetic. I think it's human and I'm trying to cling on to that word: Human. It's becoming more difficult. I'm getting close to giving up, to ignoring what she makes me do. When I do, she hurts me. She applies pain directly into my brain, to the little place that I exist in, where my soul resides in hiding. I'm past hurting. I'm past playing games for her.

I don't know why I've labelled her 'she'. In mythology, Osiris was male, but her previous host was female and whilst symbiotes are gender free, we still assign them one. Osiris thinks this is pathetic, too, another thing that the simple Tau'ri cannot grasp. And yet they prefer certain genders as host. Osiris must have picked me, a female, for a reason. I think I'd rather think of my captor as a female because I cannot stand the idea of a male invading my very being. And even though I want to give up, I know that I can't because my friends will come and rescue me.

I try not to think about Earth and my friends because she's already using everything else about me against me. Something scares me about her because she hasn't mentioned them. I have some access to her thoughts and her memories, but there are huge gaps and there's something she's trying her hardest to keep from me. She keeps distracting me with the torture of an innocent to keep me from prying.

She has something planned, I know it, and it's so bad that she's protecting it from me. I don't know how I'm going to find out, but I have to and then I have to stop her.

Now she's laughing at me.

SG – SG – SG 


	6. Chapter 6

In the locker room, Daniel was watching Jack and he could not help but be worried for his friend. He shared a quick look with Teal'c and the Jaffa nodded. The three of them were all kitted out in their off-world gear. Daniel had paused when Jack ordered them all to get ready, but Jack's look had made it clear to not question or disobey. He was now watching the colonel slam his locker door shut.

"I just can't believe," Jack angrily declared, "that Jacob knows where Sam is and he isn't doing anything about it. If it were Daniella, you wouldn't be able to hold me back."

Daniel's eyebrows raised in slight disbelief at Jack's comment. "Jack, we can't hold you back now." Jack gave a slight nod to the younger man. "Which leads me to the question: what is the plan?"

Turning, Jack slowly considered the two men, as if questioning their trustworthiness. "We're going through the 'gate."

"What?"

"With or without the Tok'ra, we're going to go and get Osiris and bring Sam home."

"We don't know where she is, Jack," Daniel pointed out, but he knew that they would find out. He knew that whatever Jack had planned, they would follow him and do what was needed. They were a team, they were a family and they would find their missing member.

"Easy answer, Daniel. I'm going to get the information out of the Tok'ra and then we're off. I'm getting her back," he promised. "Dani needs more than just me to raise her."

"What about you, Jack? What do you need?" Daniel knew that his friends had been arguing about their relationship just prior to Sam's abduction, but no one was sure what had happened afterwards. Daniel had not been present during Jack's recent Zatarc testing, but Janet had mentioned that Jack admitted that he loved Sam.

"Just her," Jack whispered and moved toward the locker room door. "Who's with me then?" he asked without glancing back.

Teal'c followed him immediately and Daniel paused for only a few seconds. He had no doubts about leaving Earth in search of Sam, but he did question how they were going to obtain the required information. Shaking his head, Daniel knew that it needed to be done, and so followed his friends.

SG – SG – SG

Jack glanced around the corner of the corridor and saw Aldwin speaking with an SGC officer. Waiting patiently as Aldwin finished his conversation and started to walk towards them, Jack hid back behind the wall and indicated to Daniel and Teal'c that Aldwin was approaching. As Aldwin passed the corner, Jack grabbed the Tok'ra's arm and pulled him towards the three of them, smiling at him. "Hey, Aldwin, we need to talk."

Aldwin looked confused, but did not try and fight when Jack led him into a nearby room. It was Felger's lab, but the scientist was not in there; the room was empty.

"Sit down," Jack commanded and Aldwin complied instantly.

"Colonel O'Neill?"

"We need to know where Osiris is."

"I cannot tell you, Colonel. You do not understand the dangers." Jack smiled pleasantly at Aldwin. "You must wait. There is more at risk than you realise."

"Where is Osiris?" Jack requested outright for the first time.

"I cannot reveal that."

Jack glanced up at Teal'c who promptly moved to stand in front of Aldwin and stared at him menacingly. "What are the co-ordinates?" Jack asked, managing to keep calm and friendly, despite what he was truly feeling.

Aldwin shook his head before stuttering, "No."

Jack and Teal'c continued to stare at Aldwin intimidatingly, waiting for him to crack. They both knew that they would never hurt Aldwin, but the Tok'ra did not know that. Jack leaned in closer to the Tok'ra so that their faces were only inches apart. He then spoke to him in a hushed whisper, "Tell me, Aldwin, are you aware of my past and some of the crazy things I've done?" The Tok'ra nodded furiously. "I won't be held responsible for what I will do to you if you don't tell me what I need to know. You think I'm exaggerating, right? That I wouldn't actually hurt you because I have too much to lose?" Jack paused and moved away from Aldwin slightly. Then, in a much louder voice he said, "Newsflash! I've already lost everything that matters and I will do anything to get her back." In a hushed voice again, "Am I clear?"

Aldwin glanced at Daniel for help and Jack had to repress the smile trying to burst onto his face. Aldwin was predictable. "Doctor Jackson, stop him."

Jack's eyes never left Aldwin. "No one's gonna stop me. They might not agree with my methods, but they'll do anything to get Carter back, too. Now," he paused to allow Aldwin a moment to think. "What are the co-ordinates?"

Aldwin relented almost immediately. "Give me something to write on and with," he requested and Daniel passed him a pencil and pad of paper. Aldwin drew six symbols and passed it back to Daniel.

Jack smiled and stood up straight. "Thanks." He turned to Daniel and said, "Go and get Carpenter and then meet me at the 'gate in ten. Teal'c," he said turning, "stay here and make sure Aldwin doesn't tell on us." Jack moved to leave the room and paused in the doorway. "Hope you're not lying to me, Aldwin."

"Colonel please!" Aldwin begged. "There may still be a Zatarc on base. You might be taking them with you and walking straight into a trap. Osiris wanted Major Carter for a specific reason."

"Chance I'll take." Jack then left the room, determined firm in his walk.

SG – SG – SG

Jack entered his quarters and immediately saw Cassie and Daniella sitting on the floor. They both looked up when they heard him and they both smiled. Daniella's smile was larger than the teenager's and she got up and toddled over to her father. Jack bent over slightly to pick her up and he was welcomed by a hug from her. The girl in his arms was *his* girl and he would do absolutely anything for her. That was what Jack could not understand about Jacob. Daniella had been coping okay since her mother's absence but she did clearly miss her and was having more tantrums than normal. Those tantrums would just get worse, Jack knew until Daniella either learnt to cope without her mother or too much time passed that she forgot her mother. There was no way that Jack was going to sit back and allow that to happen. Daniella needed her mother. Jack needed Sam.

"Dada!" she declared as she shmooshed her face against his cheek in a 'kiss'.

Jack smiled. "Hey, honey. Love you."

"Love," she repeated before: "Momma!"

Jack felt a pain in his chest at her word. "Maybe later, okay? Dada find Momma."

Daniella nodded her head, but there was a sullen look on her face. Jack tickled her belly and the gorgeous smile returned to Daniella's face. Putting her back down on the floor, Daniella resumed playing with her toys. She was playing with a toy train and it appeared to be her favourite toy. Jack could remember questioning Sam as to why she had given their daughter a train and she had replied that she had loved playing with trains. Apparently, Sam had often played with her older brother's toys and she saw nothing wrong in allowing her daughter to play with stereotypical 'boys' toys.

"I'll be back in a few hours, okay?"

"Kay," she repeated without taking her eyes from her train. "Choo choo," she sang as she pushed her train backwards and forwards.

"Where are you going, Jack?" Cassie asked anxiously.

"Getting Sam back."

"I'll go get mom, then you can go," she tried to suggest. She attempted to move past Jack, to get to the door and leave him with Daniella. He stopped her, but said nothing. She understood. "You are coming back, aren't you?" she whispered, her voice trembling.

He turned from the teenager and opened the door to his quarters to leave. "Look after her, Cassie, and give this letter to Jacob." He handed her a sealed envelope and made a step to leave the room, but Cassie grabbed his arm to prevent him. The envelope was for Jacob to open after SG-1 had left and it gave him directions to leave Earth with Daniella and Cassie so that if they failed in rescuing Sam, the girls would be safe. If Osiris really had a plan and had taken Sam with a goal in mind, Jack could only assume that part of that goal would be Earth.

"Jack, wait!" she pleaded. "I don't know what you're planning, but clearly no one knows. It's better to have one parent than none. Trust me."

He kissed the teenager's forehead and hugged her briefly. Before speaking, Jack turned back to the door to avoid her eyes. "I know that," he nodded. "I can't sit here and wait for someone to bring her back."

"Make sure that you both come home then," she commanded.

"I promise," he smiled and walked off before she could see the doubt on his face.

SG – SG – SG 


	7. Chapter 7

Jack entered the 'gate room and saw Daniel already waiting at the base of the ramp. They each smiled a bit hesitantly at each other and then Jack glanced up at the control room. The Stargate was already spinning and he saw Carpenter up in the control room and dialling the planet that Aldwin had given them the co-ordinates to. The klaxons were already sounding and Jack knew that it would not be long before somebody arrived to try and stop them. He could only hope that the Stargate would activate before that point and that then Teal'c and Carpenter could still make it to the Stargate. The 'gate engaged and within just a few seconds, Teal'c and Carpenter entered the embarkation room from opposite doors.

"Let's go, campers!" Jack said re-positioning the cap on his head and they all began to walk up the ramp. Turning to Carpenter, Jack said, "Daniel told you this isn't an order, right?"

"Yes, sir, but everything I've learnt about SG-1 says that they stick together and don't leave anyone behind. In fact, I believe that you guys have done *this* before."

Jack nodded thinking back to Apophis' planned attack on Earth and when SG-1 had disobeyed direct orders to try and stop it. They had succeeded then so maybe there was a chance this time. As the team reached the event horizon, General Hammond's voice came over the PA system: "Colonel O'Neill, SG-1, stand down!" he commanded.

None of SG-1 paused or glanced back, not even Carpenter who had possibly never disobeyed a direct order in her entire career. As a team they stepped into the wormhole and travelled across the stars until they emerged and found themselves in a room which looked distinctly Goa'uld.

"Has Aldwin tricked us?" Carpenter asked as all four of them remained where they were, staring at everything ahead of them.

"I do not believe so," Teal'c replied. "This is indeed of Goa'uld design."

"Tell me we're not on a freaking ship," Jack pleaded.

Daniel shook his head. "No one said anything about a ship. Maybe the 'gate was moved."

"Very good, Daniel."

Everyone knew to whom the deepened voice belonged as they all slowly turned around to see who it was standing on the other side of the Stargate and flanked by Jaffa.

"Sam," Jack whispered.

SG – SG – SG

She is still torturing me. She attacked a planet from her ship and made me watch. The planet's people had not done anything. She had nothing to gain from the act. She was not losing anything by allowing the planet to live. There was no punishment needed, no stand to make. There was no reputation to keep or a show of force to scare someone else. She did it purely to torture me. She heard my protesting screams, my pained shouts, my silent screeches. And she laughed at me.

She set a whole planet on fire for my benefit.

And then she hinted at this great plan that she has. I fought back with her and declared defiantly that my team would come for me.

They have not disappointed.

Four members of my family stand in front of me. I can't explain or describe what I see in their eyes, but it breaks me inside. Sadness. Fear. Shock. Disgust. Regret. Pain.

Love.

I see it all. They want me home. They want to get the snake out of me, make me human again. I know that if they can't they will kill me. Any one of them would kill me if they got the chance and all hope was lost. Even Daniel.

I can see it in Jack and Daniel's eyes - they know that it's Osiris standing in front of them, that it's merely the shell of my body and not me. They can't hide the love from their eyes though, and anything I can see, *she* can see. She knows SG-1 better than they know themselves. No Goa'uld has ever had a better advantage over Earth and it's my fault. That's why any of the four of them will kill me and her at the first opportunity. I don't want that. I want them to fight her, I want them to win, I want them to rescue me and free me from this torment.

Was this her plan? Is this her big hinted at plan? I can't believe that her plan was simply to get them here and do what no other Goa'uld has ever managed: Kill SG-1. She had Sarah and didn't need me for that. There has to be something bigger at plan, but she definitely has plans for them right now. I'm going to be forced to watch through my own eyes as she tortures them with my hands. I'm going to have to look into their eyes as she inflicts such pain that I cannot imagine. She's already told me that what Ba'al did to Jack will pale into comparison with what she has planned for each and every one of them. Like a personal trainer creating a personalised gym plan, she has distinct torture regimes for each of them.

It's been painful and impossible to watch her kill others, but to watch her kill my family, those that I love more than anyone else in the universe, with my own hands...

I'd give up.

I'd die inside.

SG – SG – SG

"Our team is here, we are all back together again," Osiris said happily. "We have been awaiting you."

"We're not your team," O'Neill replied. His voice was scarily devoid of any emotion. "You're not Carter."

"You would like to think that, would you not? You try to believe it, but you see Samantha Carter and know she is in here." Osiris paused, taking a few steps closer to the group. "She told me that you would come for her."

"And we have." O'Neill had not expected to feel this confused. He knew that it was Osiris standing in front of him, but its voice was Carter's. Osiris looked and sounded just like Carter. The Goa'uld's eyes had not yet flared yellow nor had the deep voice been used since its arrival. It was Sam.

"You are too late to rescue her. She has succumbed to me." Osiris stepped closer again and O'Neill raised his Zat weapon. "You will not harm us."

He knew what he needed to do. His military training was practically screaming in his head to shoot. They had the opportunity, possibly their only chance and he should take it. It would just be a Zat hit. If he only fired the once, Osiris/Carter would be in pain, but unconscious and still alive. They could flee the other Jaffa and take her home. It sounded so simple. It was his engrained training that had ruled his life for the majority of it. He had made the tough decision before and he knew that he was capable of making it again, time and time again. But he could not. He could not squeeze the trigger and fire the electrical impulse. "It's just a Zat," he replied. "Carter'll be fine."

"Foolish, colonel. I will make sure that she is not *fine*. We know you are aware of the pain a symbiote can inflict upon their host." Osiris had continued stepping forward and was now standing directly in front of O'Neill. Teal'c and Daniel were just to O'Neill's left whilst Carpenter was on his right. O'Neill knew that all three of them were prepared to shoot Osiris and that they were quietly waiting for him. O'Neill saw Daniel take a small step forwards.

"What do you intend on doing with us?" he asked.

Osiris took a step towards Daniel and O'Neill lowered his Zat very slightly. He was not yet ready to risk Carter. "We are aboard my ship and we are waiting."

"Not again," O'Neill muttered.

"Waiting for what?" Daniel asked.

Osiris laughed. "This ship is on a planet and not going anywhere. Do not panic, Jack." O'Neill bristled at the sound of his name with Carter's voice. "This is not like the last time. Apophis is not the God about whom you need to worry."

"Who is?" Daniel asked.

Osiris turned and glared at him. "All of your questions, Daniel," she roared. "You should learn to mind your own business." O'Neill had never seen Carter in such an angry state and in that moment, he had no doubt that she was not his love. Osiris quickly raised her hand, bearing the hand device she wore and used it on Daniel. Daniel flew backwards some feet and crashed to the floor. O'Neill winced as he raised his Zat once again. The other two reaffirmed their grips on their weapons. "Do not think it, O'Neill. Jaffa," she called, "kree!" As six more Jaffa entered from the open doorway behind Osiris, she said, "You are now our prisoners."

Two of the Jaffa grabbed Teal'c, each forcefully holding one arm and they led him from the room. The third Jaffa grabbed Carpenter by the elbow and led her behind Teal'c. Neither of them put up a fight and each dropped their weapons without question. They all knew that it was not the right time to resist. O'Neill watched as a fourth Jaffa went over to the unconscious Daniel and hoisted him up onto his shoulder. Osiris nodded at this Jaffa as he passed her. O'Neill waited patiently as the rest of his team were taken from the room while two Jaffa simply looked at him. Once the others were out of sight, Osiris nodded at the two remaining Jaffa. As they reached for O'Neill, he threw a punch at one and attempted at the second, but was grabbed from behind by the first. The second then punched him in the stomach, causing him to double slightly in pain. Osiris came to stand in front of O'Neill. She forced his head up to look at her.

"Keep fighting for your Tau'ri pride, Jack. It upsets her to see you in pain." Osiris paused and smiled wickedly. "I enjoy her pain." O'Neill glared at Osiris, but acquiesced. He refused to play into Osiris' hands and he did not want Carter to suffer. He shook the Jaffa's restraints off and wondered why Osiris had just revealed that Carter was still in there and able to feel pain. Osiris turned to the two Jaffa. "Take him to my chambers."

SG – SG – SG 


	8. Chapter 8

Teal'c listened carefully as two Jaffa held onto him tightly and led him somewhere within the ship. He could hear that Carpenter and another Jaffa were immediately behind him and that she was walking freely. No one else had mounted a resistance either. He could not hear anyone else behind him, neither Daniel Jackson being carried nor Colonel O'Neill being dragged. Teal'c covertly took in his path from the Stargate in case the route would be needed again later on. He knew that Colonel O'Neill would have a plan of some sort, but he also knew how difficult it would be for him to agree to what could become the last, only, viable option. Teal'c knew what it was like to have the mother of his child in danger and he understood that, for O'Neill, it was really not that simple. Teal'c knew that the time may come where it was he who would have to take action. Just as he had with Sha're and Amounet. He knew that he would act again in that matter, when it was needed.

Teal'c was pushed into a Goa'uld cell and seconds later, Lieutenant Carpenter fell to the floor where the Jaffa pushed her forcefully. Offering a hand to the lieutenant, Teal'c helped her to her feet and Carpenter nodded her thanks. It was a standard Goa'uld cell, with the opening on one side and it was already closed. The Jaffa had brought neither Daniel Jackson nor Colonel O'Neill to the cell. As Teal'c moved towards the opening, trying to see if there was another cell for the other two men, a quiet voice came from the corner.

"Please," it begged. "Please, don't hurt me." The voice was feminine and Teal'c nodded his head at Carpenter. She took a few steps towards the darkened corner.

"Hello," she said gently, "we're not here to hurt you. We're prisoners of Osiris."

"Don't!" the voice screamed. "Don't say its name!"

"I'm sorry," Carpenter said calmly. "We won't hurt you. What's your name? Mine's Nicola and this is Teal'c."

"Teal'c?" the voice questioned, moving slightly but remaining in shadows.

"Oh, it's okay," Carpenter realised. "He is a Jaffa, but he isn't one of O-" She stopped herself. "He's a good guy, he doesn't follow any Goa'uld or God." Teal'c inclined his head and attempted a small smile to reassure the other prisoner. He was accustomed to this reaction.

"I know you," the voice whispered. "I know both of you." The prisoner moved forward slightly, her head moving into the light. Carpenter stepped back as the dim light hit the dirty prisoner's face and even Teal'c's face registered shock.

"It is Sarah Gardner," he stated.

SG – SG – SG

And so my family came, walking straight into the trap that she knew would work because I told her. I feel violated, that my knowledge and thoughts are being used by such an enemy to destroy my family. And what next? My planet? By now, she knows everything. She knows about my family, my friends. She knows where the Tok'ra are, how F302s work, human technology. She knows my friends' weaknesses, my planet's weaknesses. She knows how they're going to try and escape this ship with or without me and how to attack my planet and wipe all life from the surface. She knows where the alpha site is, she knows everything. I've never been so unfaithful and treasonous. Earth has never been so compromised. It won't be long before she tells another Goa'uld and killing me won't suffice.

If Jack doesn't kill me soon, it'll be too late.

Right now, they're prisoners. Trapped for my evil double to do its bidding. She is going to torture them.

Not for information - she has all that she needs from me and I gave it without a fight, as she slipped through my memory neurons absorbing everything. She's going to torture them for the simple pleasure that she always obtains from inflicting such pain on others and because of the pain that it will provide me. She will do it purely to hear their screams of agony and my screams to stop. She will make us all beg for their lives and she will never tire of it. The sarcophagus is going to be heavily used for the foreseeable future. She was right when she said that Ba'al's torture of Jack would be nothing in comparison to what she was going to do. She knows their individual weaknesses and she will make them each suffer like no other Goa'uld ever has.

She will not kill them.

She will kill them over and over, simply resurrecting them each time.

My family, my home has never been this compromised. I have never felt so traitorous to my entire species. Or to my Colonel. Because unlike any other Goa'uld before, Osiris knows him. She knows that I love him and that I would do anything to stop his pain. She knows that he will kill us. If he needs to. He has done it before and he will do it again. Unless she breaks him first because she knows that he loves me too.

SG – SG – SG

O'Neill's knees hurt as they always did when he was forced to kneel in front of a Goa'uld. This time it was so incredibly different though. This Goa'uld knew him better than any other before it, better than any other person. O'Neill had always prided himself in the closeness of SG-1, even after Carpenter had joined. During every up and down that SG-1 had, they had always remained close. That admired closeness was to become the team's complete undoing. He knew that it was much more far-reaching than that; it was not just SG-1 who were about to be destroyed by a Goa'uld, it was also Earth. O'Neill could only hope that General Hammond was evacuating the planet to a new alpha site. It would never be good enough.

The Goa'uld was nowhere to be seen and O'Neill had been alone in its chambers for a long time, with two Jaffa behind him and silently waiting. He was concerned as to the Goa'uld's whereabouts and those of his team. There was also a large amount of concern for the fact that not only had he walked into a trap, he had no way of escaping. It knew everything he was thinking. It could recognise any tell on his face that he was about to do something. It would always be one step ahead of him. O'Neill was refusing to call it 'she' because that was Carter's gender, not the evil parasitic snake which had invaded her.

He was not even sure that the others could come up with any escape plan without it figuring them out. Carpenter was possibly their best hope as the only one who did not work closely with Carter. After seven years of working together, not much came as a shock to the other. He knew that he would kill it if the situation deemed it. The bigger problem was that he needed the opportunity and that was where it would always beat him.

"Rise, Jack," it said and O'Neill glanced over at the doorway. It walked towards him and waved the two Jaffa away. "Rise," it repeated, "we know how your knees bother you." O'Neill stood slowly and warily. It unnerved him when it spoke in Carter's voice and he wished it would use the deeper Goa'uld voice. It was trying to sound and move like she did. He tried to remind himself that it was not Carter. "My host," it said, gesturing for O'Neill to move towards a bench. "Please sit." He did as she requested. "She has revealed many secrets to me," it continued. "She tried to fight at first, but everyone gives up eventually. She fought more than my previous host, but she did have the experiences of Jolinar." It smiled. "Which I now have. She gave up. She is weak and mine now. Just as you, your team and soon your planet will be." As it spoke, it started stroking O'Neill's face and he had to fight the feeling that it was Carter.

"I don't believe you," he rasped with a voice successfully devoid of emotion again. He knew that it was lying. He knew Carter. He knew that she had fought Jolinar all those years ago and that she would fight harder now. She had more to fight for.

"Oh, you do not?" it asked. It put a hand on his knee and laughed. It sounded evil and nothing like Carter. "I have learnt something very interesting concerning you, Jack."

He did not react to it touching him, to Carter's voice saying his name, to it goading him. "That's nice," he replied nonchalantly. It leaned closer to him and looked at him. O'Neill continued staring directly ahead, playing a scene in his mind. He could move his hands and turn so quickly. He was sure that he could act before she could respond. He could reach for its throat and strangle the life out of it. He could watch as the evil died in her eyes, both lives ebbing from the one body. He could do it. He could kill it. He was not ready to kill Carter yet.

"She loves you," it whispered into his ear causing a shiver to run down his spine. He could hear the glee in its voice. It thought it had him trapped.

"Again," he shrugged his shoulders, "that's nice." His mind was racing, but he managed to not show anything externally. He kept his heart rate at a constant base level to prevent it from giving him away.

"She believes that you love her." It was still whispering into his ear, sending incredibly mixed messages through his senses.

"She can believe whatever she wants."

It sharply turned his head by grabbing his chin with its free hand. Anger flashed in its eyes before a glow replaced the anger. O'Neill's jaw clenched in revulsion as he was forced to look into its eyes. "Whether you love her or not," it growled with the deep Goa'uld voice, "you will not kill us."

"Wanna bet?" he asked defiantly. "I won't hesitate in killing you."

"Not if it means killing her. Maybe she is misinformed that you love her, but you do care for her."

"Or maybe she's misinforming you," he goaded. "Maybe she's not as weak as you think and you don't have control yet."

Its eyes narrowed at him. "She is not the only source of information that I have. You will not kill us."

"Check your host's memories," O'Neill advised. "I've done it before and I will do it again. If I can't have Carter, I damn well won't let you."

It paused and released his chin from its tight grip. He rubbed his chin and cheeks slightly, both of its hands resting on his knees. Their eyes remained locked, the yellow had gone from its. "She does indeed have those thoughts. But that was then. You would not kill us. Not her. She loves you." It started to seem troubled by what it knew. O'Neill remembered how in its previous host, Osiris had shown concern for Daniel on occasion.

"Yeah, sure, yabetcha." O'Neill smiled for a moment before resuming his impassive appearance.

It glared at him angrily, stood up and violently pushed him backwards. O'Neill fell off of the bench, landing hard on his back. He winced with the pain. "The thing I dislike most about a host," it ranted, "is their love." It began to pace backwards and forwards, still on the other side of the bench from which O'Neill had fallen. "Their hatred and suffering is immense, but thoroughly enjoyable." O'Neill started to sit, leaning up on his elbows. He watched it pace. It looked like it was about to have a breakdown. Maybe Carter was getting to it, O'Neill considered. "Their love though," it spat. It shook its head. "It persists. It infects me and keeps them strong." It stopped walking and looked at O'Neill. "Even now, her love for you, for her family, it keeps her persisting. It has taken over every other sensation from her." It walked toward him, moving around the bench and came to a stop at O'Neill's feet. "All I feel from her now is love. I cannot stand it!" it screamed.

O'Neill could not help but smirk. In all of the years working with Carter and then living with her, too, he had never seen her have a child-like temper tantrum. He had to admit that it was amusing, especially given that it was actually Osiris having a temper tantrum which he hoped meant that Carter was fighting back, resisting and attacking. "Don't like it, do ya?"

It glared at him without answering before stalking the last few steps toward him. It looked like a predator stalking its prey. O'Neill knew that he was the prey and that the torture was about to begin. It stopped with one foot on either side of his knees. He looked up, hoping to get a heads up as to what type of torture it would use first. "I could torture you," it threatened. The anger had gone from its voice and it knelt down. Its knees aligned with his hips and it gently pushed his upper body back down to the cool floor. "That would anger her, sadden her, and make me feel so very happy at your mutual pain."

"Go ahead," he dared. He did not care what pain it caused him, or what suffering it also caused Carter as long as his team was coming up with something.

"I'm sure that she will suffer more whilst I torture you than when I tortured Daniel." A look of concern flitted over O'Neill's face, causing it to smile. "You were not my first and you will not be my last." It leaned down on top of him. "Or," it whispered, its mouth almost touching his, "I could take pleasure from you."

It kissed him and he tried to protest. It parted his lips and he saw no point in resisting. He had to give his team more time. It was Carter on top of him, O'Neill tried to convince himself. He was kissing Carter, the woman he loved, he told himself. Allowing himself to respond to her, O'Neill found it easier than he had thought. She pulled away slightly, smiling and their eyes met. For an instant, a nanosecond, O'Neill saw Carter in the eyes, he saw her, he believed it was Carter above him. His lips began to curve into a smile.

His face froze as the very familiar lovely eyes glowed a hideous yellow. 

SG – SG – SG


	9. Chapter 9

Jacob stood at the base of the Stargate with the blue glow of the wormhole on his face. He glanced down at his beloved grand-daughter who was, at the moment, standing freely next to him. She was frozen to the spot with her blue eyes widely staring at the Stargate. Her parents had never brought her to the vicinity of the Stargate before and the child clearly found it fascinating. All that Jacob could do was watch her innocent amazed expression. Daniella was in such shock that she had let go of Cassie's hand and both arms hung limply at her sides. Jacob wished that Sam could see this moment. His attention was drawn to George as he approached them with Janet next to him.

Janet moved towards her daughter and hugged her tightly before kissing her cheek. Jacob watched noticing that the teenager did not have any embarrassment on her face. He was glad that Cassie knew how serious the situation was and that she was ready to act properly. He had considered requesting for Sasha to join him and help with Daniella. It had not taken long for Selmak to advise to him that Sasha currently had no idea whatsoever about the Stargate or aliens or anything beyond her own planet. She would be in too much shock to aid him in the situation. There was also the fact that Jack had requested in his letter that he take Cassie with him. Jack wanted both girls safe and he had indicated that he only trusted Jacob with the task. Jacob was honoured by this fact, but he also hated the fact that this was even happening. Jack should never have run off on a foolish rescue mission, but his statements within his letter were true. Jacob and George were both in agreement that Earth was possibly in danger given the knowledge that Osiris was now in command of. The alpha site was already in the process of being relocated and a first stage evacuation of the planet was already underway. Aldwin had also gone back to the Tok'ra to begin their relocation. After being given the choice by George to evacuate with other humans, Jacob had declined his suggestion and was following Jack's direction in his letter by taking the girls to nowhere anyone would find them.

George turned to Jacob and said, "Take care of our girls."

Jacob nodded and forced himself to smile. "I wish we were parting for much different reasons." Unable to deny that part of him wanted to be with Jack and SG-1, aiding in the rescue of his daughter, Jacob knew that he had a much more important task of keeping his grand-daughter safe and was aware that there was a lot more at risk than just SG-1 on their foolish mission. He knew more than the humans concerning Anubis and his plans, but he did not know as much as the rest of the Tok'ra. There was a lot more at risk than just SG-1 and Earth.

"If everything goes okay with SG-1 and at this end, you should be able to contact us in a few days."

Jacob nodded again. "We'll try. Hopefully it won't be too long until it's safe to return. Make sure that you tell Sasha something, won't you?"

Janet stepped away from Cassie and she was clearly trying to blink back tears. "I'll go around and see her tonight. Give her a holiday." She stroked her daughter's cheek. "Be good for Jacob."

Cassie rolled her eyes and nodded. "Yes, mom."

Smiling naturally, Jacob picked his grand-daughter up and started walking towards the Stargate. He paused at the mouth of the wormhole and an unsettling feeling washed over him. Glancing at his blonde haired grand-daughter, Jacob wished that it was a two year old Samantha in his arms and that he could protect his daughter from everything. He wished that it was Samantha that he could protect forever, but in reality he had no idea if he was ever going to see his daughter again.

SG – SG – SG

Teal'c remained seated on the floor of the cell, watching as two Jaffa returned with Colonel O'Neill and almost threw him into the cell. The colonel rolled twice on the ground, lay still for a few moments and then stood up. The Jaffa turned to Carpenter and ordered, "You."

Carpenter nodded at Teal'c and obeyed the Jaffa. O'Neill seemed to be paying absolutely no attention to what was going on with his team mate and he walked towards a wall and placed his forehead against it. Once the Jaffa had left with Nicola, they closed the entrance to the cell.

Teal'c stood and gently approached O'Neill. "O'Neill?"

"I'm fine, T."

Teal'c did not believe his friend. "Colonel O'Neill," he repeated, "what did she want?"

"It. That thing." He pointed past the entrance. "It is not a she. It is not Carter." O'Neill turned around, but refused to meet Teal'c's eyes. "It didn't want anything. Just to make Carter suffer."

"Suffer," a laughing voice said and O'Neill looked at Teal'c questioningly.

"Who's that?"

"Osiris' previous host - Sarah Gardner."

"That's what he does," Sarah laughed again. "Makes you suffer." She came out of the shadows again. When she saw O'Neill's face, Sarah grinned. "He has plans for you. We were excited about you and her."

"What?" O'Neill asked.

"He's been waiting for you and her. Her more so." She laughed again. "I know you." She retreated back into the shadows and O'Neill exchanged a look with Teal'c.

"She was already present when Carpenter and I were incarcerated."

"Don't they normally kill the host?" O'Neill asked.

"Indeed."

"You said when you and Carpenter got here, what about Daniel?"

"I have not seen him since we were all together in proximity to the Stargate."

"Daniel?" Sarah asked, running out from her hidden location towards O'Neill. "He was right, you know? Everything. I tried not to believe it, but he told me. He has Daniel now. He's got all of you now." She paused, looking off into the distance at nothing. "I loved Daniel once. He feels that, too," she whispered before sinking to the floor in front of O'Neill and then curling into a ball. O'Neill exchanged another look with Teal'c, who simply raised his eyebrow in concern.

SG – SG – SG 


	10. Chapter 10

Jack returned to leaning against the wall, trying to shake the fuzz out of his brain. He felt numb inside. He felt sick and repulsed by himself. He should never have allowed what occurred to happen. He should have done something to stop it, to fight against it. Even after its eyes glowed, reinforcing the fact that it was not Sam, he did not stop it. What made him feel so repulsed was the fact that she knew. She was in there somewhere and she had heard him.

She had seen him.

She had felt him.

She had tasted him.

Repulsion and shame consumed him. Every single second had screamed at him that it was not Sam, yet he had allowed himself to react.

Jack ran his hands over his face, knowing that he had to get it together and sort himself out. His team was looking at him to lead, to get them out of here. Teal'c was still sitting on the opposite side of the cell to Jack, watching and taking everything in. Carpenter had been returned a few minutes earlier, after a relatively short torture and Sarah Gardner was curled in the corner. He had to get all three of them out of this situation, find Daniel and then, somehow, get Sam back. Turning to Carpenter he asked, "What happened to you then?"

She looked straight at him. "Not much. It didn't ask me anything. It, uh, used the pain stick a few times. Gave me terrible nightmares with the hand device." Carpenter paused. "It then went the human way."

"Human?" he asked, wondering what the younger lieutenant had suffered at the hands of the Goa'uld.

"It stabbed me, right in the gut." She was no longer looking at Jack, but staring off into the distance. "It watched as I bled. It... probed... the wound. It just watched and I felt the blood flow and then drip until it stopped." Jack winced and allowed her to speak at her own pace. "I was aware of taking my last breath and my heart slowing. I closed my eyes and I opened them in here." She sniffed and wiped at her face with her sleeve. "At least I didn't scar."

The only thing that Jack could think was that Osiris could have channelled Sam's resentment towards the lieutenant. Jack knew that even if Sam had disliked Carpenter, she would still have hated to watch her be killed. "You okay, ready?" She nodded.

A few minutes later, Teal'c caught Jack's attention; the Jaffa were returning with Daniel. Jack only knew that Daniel was returning because he could hear him protesting about being pushed. Jack was curious as to why Daniel had been absent for so long. No one had seen him since they had arrived at the gate address. As the Jaffa and Daniel came into view, Jack made eye contact with Daniel and the younger man nodded. As the entrance to the cell opened, Teal'c and Jack both rushed forward at the Jaffa. Caught in the middle, Daniel was sent sprawling to the floor, landing near to where Sarah was hiding. Carpenter lunged forward and grabbed a staff weapon from the Jaffa Teal'c was fighting. As soon as there was an opening, Carpenter fired on Teal'c's Jaffa, killing him. The second Jaffa paused allowing Jack to land a punch straight on his jaw. As the Jaffa recoiled, Carpenter fired the staff at him. Jack picked up the second staff weapon and threw it over to Teal'c who immediately moved with Carpenter to keep watch. Jack turned to Daniel who had managed to stand. "Nice of you to join us, Danny."

"What?" Daniel asked. "I haven't been gone that long."

"Yeah, yeah you have." Jack wanted answers, but he knew that now was not the right time. Unfortunately he kept hearing Aldwin's words echoing through his head: _There may be a Zatarc on base. You might be taking them with you and walking straight into a trap. Osiris wanted Major Carter for a specific reason_. It could be either Daniel or Carpenter, and escaping now could be that specific reason.

"Sorry," Daniel replied sarcastically, "but what do you-" he was cut off by Sarah's quiet voice.

"Danny? Daniel?"

"Who? What?" Daniel questioned as he turned toward the sound. Sarah peered out into the light slightly. "Sarah, oh my God." He rushed and knelt in front of her, gently raising a hand to her cheek.

"I'm not a God anymore, Daniel."

"Daniel, can you bring her?" Jack asked. "We don't have much time."

"Yeah, sure," Daniel replied in shock.

"Okay, let's get moving." He did not need to say whether they were heading directly to the Stargate or to try and find Sam, his team knew. As they started carefully along the corridor, Jack was very aware that only two of his team were armed and that the fourth member was helping a frail injured civilian along. A civilian that Jack was very aware could easily be a spy as well or something far worse.

"Colonel," Carpenter said, "the room I was tortured in was along here." Jack nodded his agreement to start heading in that direction when suddenly a large tremor shook through the ship causing everyone to stumble. Sarah fell to the floor and Daniel helped her back to her feet.

"What was that?" Jack asked. "If that was us taking off..."

"He's here." Sarah whispered. Everyone turned to her. "He's going to punish us all." Jack knew that the only person to whom she could be referring was the Goa'uld Osiris worked for: Anubis.

SG – SG – SG

They all started to move again, even more wary due to the possible threat that Anubis was attacking. Passing an open doorway, Jack paused and gestured for the others to. Peering around the opening to look into a room he had not seen on his journey to the cell, Jack narrowed his eyes at what he saw and swore slightly under his breath. "Daniel," he whispered and Daniel was instantly at his side.

"What?" Jack motioned for him to look into the adjacent room. Daniel did as he was told and a similar look fell over his face.

"Don't they look an awful lot like those aliens that tried to invade the SGC?" Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Daniel nod.

"What are they doing here?" Daniel asked with an incredible amount of curiosity. Both men remembered the day of Daniella's birth; the day when the SGC had been infiltrated by an alien race who had weapons similar to the Goa'uld and who literally vanished after their invasion. They had never learnt anything further about the alien race. Jack had no idea what they were doing here, on Osiris' fortified base.

Both men turned to Sarah who whispered, "Anubis has a new army."

Jack exchanged looks with Daniel and then with Teal'c before he and Daniel looked at Sarah. Jack nodded and then gestured for everyone to resume following him because there was no point in standing there staring at the black clad alien army. Realisation set in Jack's mind however and he turned to Carpenter. "Can I grab that staff, lieutenant?" he asked. She said nothing as she handed it to him. "Thanks," he replied. Jack held the staff in one hand, then passed it to the other hand before suddenly spinning it and himself round to point it at Daniel, Carpenter and the injured Sarah. The three of them stood still; Daniel looked at him quizzically while Carpenter bared her hands to him in an act of defence. Sarah huddled slightly closer to Daniel with fear across her face.

"Jack, what are you doing?" Daniel asked.

"O'Neill," Teal'c said as he moved to stand next to Jack.

"There's something too wrong here." He pointed to where they had just left the alien army. "Two years ago, those aliens try and force their way onto Earth and then disappear without a single trace, then they turn out to be Anubis' army." Jack paused. "Way I see it," Jack continued, "is that Aldwin said there might be a Zatarc amongst us and you two have been in prolonged contact with Osiris. None of that adds up to anything good."

"Jack, are you serious?" Daniel questioned taking a step towards him.

Jack pointed the staff at him. "Don't, Daniel. Anubis is probably here with his new army and one of you two might be in league with him."

"What?"

"Osiris told me that it had more than just Sam's memory, that it had another source of information. That could be either one of you two," he eyed Daniel and Carpenter suspiciously. "Right now, I don't trust either of you and Sarah… Sarah's not exactly a chipper young lady," Jack finished diplomatically. "Here's the plan: Teal'c, you take Carpenter and Sarah back to the Gate. Dial somewhere, anywhere and keep that Gate open for as long as possible. Danny and I will try and get Carter back."

"Jack, there's only two weapons and if Anubis is attacking that leaves us pretty unguarded. We had a hard time with these aliens on our own turf and two years have passed since then. Do you really think that splitting up is the way to go?" Daniel asked and Teal'c turned to Jack warily.

"I promise to keep you alive until you betray me, Daniel."

"O'Neill, you may in fact be the Zatarc." Teal'c interjected.

"And if I am then you, T, are the only one who definitely can't be and you're going straight to the Stargate and getting out of this place. That way if it's me or Daniel, you're leaving us here with Osiris. If it is Carpenter, then you can cope with her. Keep the 'gate open 'til the last possible moment." Jack turned his head to Teal'c. "When you get back to Earth, get both girls tested for everything. Everything. Don't trust any of us. Don't turn your back on them. Or me."

"If I am to walk away from you now, O'Neill, is that not me turning my back on you?" Jack gave him an exasperated look and with a small smile Teal'c nodded and motioned for the girls to follow him. Carpenter complied immediately, however Sarah paused until Daniel nodded at her. After the three of them had headed off in one direction, Jack and Daniel faced each other.

"You really think I'm a Zatarc?" Daniel asked.

"Daniel, you were with Osiris the longest."

"You could be one, too."

"Daniel," Jack warned as he motioned for Daniel to follow him in the direction of Osiris' chambers'. "Carter needs to be rescued and that's what we're doing, okay?"

"Yes, Jack."

"Any problems with that?"

"No, Jack."

"Good. Now," Jack paused for a moment to check an open doorway. He waved his hand at Daniel, making him enter the room first. Jack followed behind him, watching their backs and their fronts. He had no idea where Daniel had been kept during his torture, but this was the room Osiris had tortured Jack in. "Any sign?" Jack asked hoping that if Daniel were a Zatarc, his programming was not to disrupt their hunt for Carter.

"Jack!" Daniel said and Jack turned towards him. Lying near the bench on the floor was Carter. Jack nodded at Daniel who then approached her carefully. Whilst maintaining guard, Jack watched Daniel approach Carter. He bent down to check her vitals.

"Daniel?" he asked.

"She has a pulse. It's weak, but it's there. Wait, her eyes are opening. Sam?" he questioned and waited silently for an answer. From Jack's location he could not hear any reply. "Jack," Daniel said excitedly. "I think it's Sam."

"What?" Jack asked, lowering his staff very slightly.

"She said 'Daniella' then passed out again. She also has... burn marks on her forehead." Jack knew what Daniel was thinking – that someone had killed Osiris like the Ashrak had killed Jolinar with a Hara'Kesh. There was no way to be sure in their current situation and it would have to wait until they returned to Earth.

Jack threw wrist restraints toward Daniel and they slid across the floor. "Tie her up and carry her to the Stargate."

"Tie her up, but Jack-"

"We don't know that Osiris is dead. Do it." Once Daniel was finished and he had managed to pick up Sam's limp body, they both began walking back to the Stargate which was hopefully being guarded by Teal'c. Jack hoped that Teal'c got there before anybody had been able to dial into the planet. He was still on full alert, possibly even more so now that they had Sam, they had what they had come here for. It was all adding up incredibly incorrectly for Jack – Anubis' mysterious warriors, Sam's easy capture, the ease of their escape and the possibility of a spy within their ranks. Things were too simple for them, but all Jack could do was prepare for the worst. Sam, with or without Osiris, was subdued and alive, Daniel was too preoccupied and under Jack's guard whilst the other possible threat was with Teal'c. Jack did not like the idea of walking back to Earth this easily, but there was nothing else that he could do and he had taken all the precautions that he could. Deep down, Jack hoped that it was not easy and that SG-1 was simply lucky. Again.

SG – SG – SG


	11. Chapter 11

Sometimes he hated his job. Sometimes he hated the people with whom he worked. Sometimes he felt that this was the worst posting he had ever received from his commanders. The amount of new worry lines and the number of sleepless nights he had incurred were both already in the hundreds. A slow descent into retirement was what he had wanted, but instead he had been ordered to the most thrilling yet most worrisome position he had ever held. For years, he had awaited the day that he could retire and spend his time at his own leisure, following nature's deadlines rather than the military's. Instead, he had SG-1 which was both the love of his life and the bane of his life. Sometimes he watched the new additions to his family and considered himself to be so amazingly lucky. From his many years of experience, he knew that luck ran out for every soldier – every person – eventually. Today was not that day for SG-1.

There was a knock on the door and he looked up from his desk, commanding whoever was at the door to enter. He set his face into a slight scowl and leaned backwards in his chair. He did not say anything, choosing the option to wait for the other man to begin and preferably he would begin by grovelling. He only had to wait a few seconds.

"I'm sorry, General."

"For what?" George asked because he had no intention of helping the colonel out.

"Disobeying direct orders. Taking my team off-world and putting them in direct danger. Doing all of this when there was possibly a spy on my team and therefore actually endangering more than just my team." Jack paused before smiling grimly. "I did at least bring them all back alive."

George shot him a warning look. He knew what Jack was saying was true, that he had in fact brought back the other four members of SG-1 and Sarah, too, but that did not cover up for what he had risked. "Colonel, I know that you understand the ramifications of what you did and how you were damn lucky this time. You walked right into Osiris' lair, possibly into his trap and you returned completely unscathed. Doesn't that seem odd to you?"

"Yes, sir."

"There anything else you need to apologise or account for?"

George could see the hesitation on Jack's face. The colonel rocked backwards and forwards on his feet, jamming his hands as far into his pockets as he could. "General," Jack started, "I need to apologise to you for my actions and the reasons behind them."

George nodded remembering the discussion concerning Zatarc testing and Jack's admittance to loving Major Carter. For many years, George had suspected as much. Even before their first Zatarc testing, George had witnessed the increasing bond between all four members of SG-1, but especially between Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter. He had never been completely comfortable with their increasing relationship, especially after they had moved in together to raise their daughter. George had never fully believed that they were just living together as parents, but he had chosen to accept what they told him because they were still able to work as a team. Throughout the years, it was the four friendship bonds and how unique it made SG-1 which kept them alive and it was for those reasons that George had always gone to bat for them and tried to ignore any misgivings he had. George could only take their word that their feelings and private living arrangements were not going to affect their work. "You've broken your word to me, son."

Jack bowed his head in shame and regret. "I am sorry, General," he apologised again. "I thought that we could work together, that our personal arrangements would not have any detrimental effect on the team." George nodded at his honesty.

"You understand that you can't work together anymore?" George knew that there was more he could say to Jack and that there was more to berate him for, but as per usual his fondness for SG-1 clouded his mind ever so slightly.

"I haven't spoken to Carter since we found her, so I don't know what's going to happen with her." George got the impression that Jack meant both in a personal and professional situation. "But this time I will follow your orders. Whatever you say. Your word's gospel. You the man." Jack's brow furrowed.

George suppressed a smile and instead simply said, "Dismissed, Colonel." SG-1 really was the love of his life and the bane of his life.

SG – SG – SG

Hesitantly, Jack knocked on the door to the private infirmary room. He had brought Sam home five days ago and she had been unconscious until a few hours ago. Jack had visited every day, spending a lot of time quietly at her bedside, too afraid to say anything. He felt it was too cheesy to speak to the comatose woman he loved and he feared that if he would say stuff that she would wake up remembering and he did not really want that. Although, considering the nerves he now felt Jack was regretting that decision. Gently, he pushed the door open without waiting for an answer to his knock because he did not know if Sam were sleeping. After closing the door behind him, Jack headed to the chair next to the bed where he had spent many hours sitting over the past five days. Sam had awoken earlier and Janet had explained to her what had happened. As he sat down Jack noted that she was indeed asleep and he figured it was possibly partially due to the fact that Janet had laid a lot of information on her. Jack was more than willing to wait for her to awaken before he tried to tell her how he felt. The road ahead for them was not going to be easy due to her recovery from Osiris' mental subjugation of her and they had never actually attempted a relationship before. He felt nervous.

As he settled into the chair he noticed her eyes slowly flicker open. "Morning," he greeted.

"Is it?"

He nodded. "You spoke to Janet a few hours ago."

"So I've been unconscious for five days?"

Again, he nodded. "And you were… missing for just over a week."

"Missing?" she laughed dryly. "Taken hostage."

"Do you remember anything?" He needed to know if she could remember all of the horrors of being invaded by a Goa'uld, of what Osiris had made her do to him.

She shook her head and Jack could see pain in response to the movement. "Nothing. Janet told me Osiris took me from a planet where SG-1 was. I don't even remember going through the 'gate."

Jack took a deep breath and leaned forwards in his chair, moving closer to her. Her admission meant that she did not remember their conversation or their kiss or how they had decided to develop their relationship. He tried to focus on her needs and how he had to explain what happened to her. Her answers were more important than him wallowing in the self-pity of being back at square one with her. "After you were taken, SG-1 came to find you. We got everyone back safely after we found you collapsed on the floor. Osiris was already gone." He pointed at her forehead and she carefully moved her right hand up to touch the burn mark above her nose. "We're assuming that Anubis killed Osiris as part of some plan." She shook her head indicating that she had no recollection. "Anise is still Zatarc testing everyone on the base, but Daniel and Carpenter both passed already." He paused and then continued, "It may have been simple, but the mission was accomplished. We kind of walked right in and then after a bit, walked straight back out. If I was a negative person, I'd say it was too simple."

"Where's Daniella?" she asked with a panic in her voice. "When can I see her?" Whilst Sam may not remember the past two weeks, she still knew that their daughter had spent that time without her mother.

"Jacob took her. After we learnt that Osiris had taken you as a host, SG-1 came after you kind of unofficially and I asked Jacob to take Cassie and Daniella off world to keep them safe. I figured that Osiris might use those memories to his advantage." Jack had also written to Jacob about his declaration concerning Sam, telling him that he was in fact in love with her, wanted to be with her and would do anything for her. "Meanwhile," Jack continued, "Aldwin went back to the Tok'ra to organize their moving and SG-3 oversaw the relocation of the alpha site."

"All because I knew where they were." It was not a question from her; it was a statement.

"There's been no indication yet that Anubis has gone after either of them or us, but we can't be too careful, can we?" Jack wanted to laugh at his own question, knowing how hypocritical it was seeing as he had left Earth with two people he could not trust and returned with four. "Maybe Anubis never got it out of Osiris before he…"

Sam nodded with a painful grimace on her face again. "But why let me live? I only survived the Ashrak because Jolinar protected me. Why would Osiris protect me when, from what I can gather, it was a plan to get me?"

"We're, uh, gonna Zatarc test you in a few days' time." He found it a difficult thing to say and suggest, but she smiled very slightly in agreement. "But you don't remember anything about being host to Osiris?"

"No. I remember going to bed at home one night and then waking up here."

"Not being taken? Not SG-1 coming to rescue you? Osiris captured us," he said as she shook her head to his questions. "You don't remember any of that?"

"No, Colonel, I don't." She sounded angry at his constant questioning highlighted by her use of his rank, but he hated the thought that she had forgotten important events in their life. He was quite glad that she could not remember anything Osiris had inflicted on SG-1 using her body. Daniel and Carpenter had both been checked out for injuries and as soon as they were cleared, both medically and from the Zatarc test, Carpenter had disappeared from the base. Jack knew that Daniel was with Sarah, who was confined to the base for now, but Carpenter had not spoken to any other member of SG-1 and had seemed incredibly relieved when they had been told that SG-1 were on extended down time. He could not help but wonder at what Osiris had fully done to Daniel and Carpenter.

"One last question," he said. "Any idea why Sarah was spared, too?"

"Sarah's alive?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah. Daniel's with her. Osiris did a right number on her." He studied her, trying to see if he could see the same level of pain and damage in her eyes that he could in Sarah's, trying to see if Sam had as much lasting mental damage.

"Why did he let us go?" Jack shrugged. "Anubis must have a reason. He must have a plan."

"Or," Jack said, "we're still lucky." His smile at Sam showed how much he disbelieved his own words.

SG – SG – SG


	12. Chapter 12

The guest quarters were in complete darkness as Daniel entered and he instinctively reached out for the light switch. As his fingertips brushed the switch a scream pierced the air. Allowing his hand to hover near the switch, Daniel followed the orders of the scream and did not turn on the light. "Sarah?"

"No. No light."

"Okay," he replied lowering his arm. "Where are you?" he asked taking a very careful step further into the room. She did not answer. "Sarah, I don't want to stand on you." He had the feeling that she was in the far corner near to the wardrobe, hiding from everyone. Daniel continued to move across the room and then felt for the lamp situated on the desk. "Sarah, may I turn on this light?" Again, she did not answer and Daniel took this to mean that it was okay for him to allow a lower level of illumination. As the light came on Daniel's thoughts were confirmed as Sarah was hiding in the corner. Unfortunately, he knew that the reality of what and who she was hiding from meant that she could never hide or escape.

"Light hurts," she whispered as Daniel gently approached her. He held out his hand to her. This had happened every day since her rescue and Daniel was confident that he had not left the base at all in the past five days. He tried to not be far from Sarah's side or for too long at the moment. "I live in the dark. He put me in the dark."

"I know," Daniel nodded. "Please take my hand and come sit on the bed." Reluctantly and slowly Sarah did so and together they walked towards the bed and sat down on it. "You don't live in the dark anymore. He's gone."

Horror crossed her face and tears immediately filled her eyes. "No! He can't be gone. Where is he?" She moved her head in small jerky motions as if trying to find him hiding somewhere within her mind. "Why has he left me? What did I do?" She began to sob, the tears spilling down her cheeks.

"It's okay, Sarah, it is," Daniel tried to reassure but he was not sure what he could say to comfort her. Anise had checked Sarah to make sure that Osiris had not caused any physical damage by leaving her and Sarah was physically very healthy. Despite her physical health, she did not look healthy. Daniel thought she looked very small and fragile, sharply contrasting with the last few times he had seen her when her body had been infused with the strength of a Goa'uld. Carefully Daniel tried to hug her and for a few moments she calmed. Then she suddenly screamed again, pulling away from Daniel and standing.

"It's too dark! There's no light!" She began turning her head wildly, trying to find the light. It confused her and she fell to a sitting position on the floor. Daniel crouched down beside her. "I can't breathe," she gasped. "There's no light. I need light. Daniel," she said looking him straight in the eye, "where is he?"

Her desire to know why Osiris had left her and to know where he was hurt Daniel the most. He knew that Osiris was evil and a parasite, but part of Sarah was so used to the alien invading her every thought and controlling all of her actions and senses that now, she missed him. Daniel tried to avoid those questions. "Do you want to go up top, like yesterday?" he asked gently. Yesterday after she had panicked about the darkness which sometimes she craved sometimes she despised, they had gone to the surface for a few minutes and Sarah had basked in the warm sunshine on her face.

"No!" she shouted. "No! Too bright, too pure." She whispered, "Too heavenly. I don't belong there." She paused and then whispered, "We did terrible things, Daniel. Terrible. Wicked. You were right."

"I was right? About what?"

"They exist." She looked up at the ceiling of her quarters. "Aliens. Men from Mars. Mork from Ork. Vulcans." She laughed hysterically.

"Yes, they do." There was no humour in Daniel's voice.

"David and Steven never believed you." She met his eyes. "I killed him." Her eyes fell to the floor. "I killed so many."

"It wasn't you," he tried to reason, but he knew that it was pointless at the present time. "Sarah, what do you know about Anubis' new army?"

"Super!" she smiled at him, excitedly clapping her hands. "Super! Super!"

He tried a different tact. "Did Osiris tell you why he wanted Sam?" It was still unsettling to Daniel that SG-1 had been so lucky the past few weeks. Osiris was dead and they had rescued both Sam and Sarah. Anise had informed him that morning that every member of SGC personnel had been Zatarc tested and everyone had been given the all clear. Relief had flooded through Daniel at this news until Anise had given her conclusion that whoever had been the Zatarc had simply completed their hidden task and therefore passed the test. That meant that it could still have been himself, that he had done something for Anubis or Osiris which worked into their plan and SG-1 had no idea what that plan could be.

"He made me do bad things. Inhuman things. He hurt me," Sarah whispered and then sadly said, "I'm alone now."

"No, Sarah, no you're not." Daniel shook his head and moved his head to meet her eyes. He could not believe the incredible sadness which lived in her eyes at the loss of Osiris. "You have me."

It was faint, but Sarah's lips curved into a small smile.

SG – SG – SG

Meanwhile in another of the personnel quarters, Teal'c was busy lighting his entire candle collection. It had been five days since his return from their successful mission and Teal'c was still incredibly troubled by the events. He had taken Lieutenant Carpenter and Sarah Gardner to the Stargate as per Colonel O'Neill's orders and had immediately dialled another planet. Teal'c was unsure if their normal IDCs would work given the fact that they had left Earth without authorisation and he did not want to risk holding the open wormhole for Colonel O'Neill and then allowing Osiris' Jaffa entrance to Earth. Teal'c was greatly troubled by the fact that whilst he had been guarding the Stargate and the two women no one else came close to them. There was not even a Jaffa patrol of the Stargate. Teal'c found this highly irregular. He had become even more troubled when Colonel O'Neill had appeared with Daniel Jackson and an unconscious Major Carter. Even now, after Doctor Fraiser had given everyone a clear medical screening and Anise had tested everyone for being a Zatarc, Teal'c still felt unease at recent events.

He was relieved that earlier that morning, Major Carter had regained consciousness, however she could not remember anything about her time as Osiris. Teal'c knew that the only way to learn anything of the plans of Osiris or Anubis would involve hypnotherapy or interrogation of Major Carter or Sarah Gardner. Colonel O'Neill refused Major Carter's hypnotherapy until she had returned home and had recovered slightly. Until then they would have no further answers or explanations and Teal'c would have to wait and see what the Goa'uld's plans for Earth were. Kel'no'reem had been alluding Teal'c since their return. He could only manage a few hours and then the relaxed state would be impossible to maintain. It would not be until he felt more at ease with recent events that he would successfully achieve Kel'no'reem.

SG – SG – SG

Pausing at the door to the infirmary, Nicola swallowed her apprehension and entered the large room. It was eerily quiet like the rest of the base and Nicola found it made her apprehension ten times worse. She had left the SGC as soon as she had been medically cleared and General Hammond had declared SG-1 on stand down until further notice. Nicola had no idea when any member would be fit and ready to resume work. She knew that Daniel was preoccupied with Sarah's mental health and would not be willing to leave her until he felt she was healing. Nicola could only imagine what both Major Carter and Sarah were going through. Then there was the impossibility of Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter remaining on SG-1 anymore. She had never felt so much in limbo concerning her work and life, and yet she also felt that she did not care. Ever since the moment she had stepped out of the SGC she had not returned, in fact she had not done anything. Nicola had gone home and gone to bed, but sleep only brought nightmares which now made her unwilling to sleep. Nicola now found herself unwilling to sleep and unable to return to work. She had not seen anyone in the past three days, nor had she spoken to anyone as she had hidden in her apartment watching the cheesiest soaps that she could.

Keeping her head down as she walked through the infirmary in an attempt to hide her reddened, tear stained face and the huge black bags under her eyes from anyone who might be here at this time of night. She had realised after two nights of incredibly troubled sleep and paralysing panic attacks that she needed help. So she fought her fear of returning to Cheyenne Mountain to seek the help of Doctor MacKenzie and here she was.

"Lieutenant Carpenter." Nicola glanced up slightly at the desk and saw Janet sitting there. "It's very late. Can I help you?"

Of all the people on the base that Nicola had tried to become friendly with, Janet was the one with whom she was nowhere near to succeeding. Most of her friendship network involved those she made early on in her career, during her training days and ever since her first posting, Nicola had found it difficult to make new friends. She had started to try to become friendly with others, but she was still reluctant with those with whom she needed a professional relationship. Therefore she found it difficult to become friendly with Colonel O'Neill as he was her commanding officer and with Janet as she was her doctor. "I was looking for Doctor MacKenzie."

"He's in Washington for a seminar. He should be back in a few days."

Nicola nodded. "Thanks. I'll come back then."

"Lieutenant, are you okay?" Janet asked.

Nicola forced both a smile onto her face and to meet Janet's eyes. Using all of her energy to keep the fake smile plastered onto her face, all that she could manage was a nod of her head. Knowing that her outward façade would soon crack, Nicola turned and headed back to the door.

"Mental scars don't heal in the sarcophagus," Janet called out and Nicola could tell that she had risen from her desk, approaching her.

Nicola paused by the door, her hand dropping away from the handle. A solitary tear rolled down her cheek. "No, no they don't."

SG – SG – SG


	13. Chapter 13

Daniel squeezed Sarah's hand gently eliciting a very slight smile from her face. He could see the fear and apprehension in her eyes, but he could also see the excitement in them. They waited patiently for the door to open and as it did his senses were filled with the fresh air smell and natural heat from the sun. They stepped through the open doorway together and after a few steps they were on the grass. Daniel tried to ignore the SF guards who kept a respectable distance but would not let them stray too far away. Sarah took her hand out of Daniel's and bent down to remove her shoes. He watched her with a smile on his face, enjoying her fascination with such simple things. She put her feet onto the grass and flexed her toes a few times. Her eyes were focusing downwards on the blades of grass which had made their way into between her toes; Daniel could see her smile because of the sensations. Her head suddenly snapped upwards to the sky and Daniel followed her gaze. A bird was flying high up above them and Sarah was smiling at it. He watched as she stretched out her own arms and slowly spun around, never taking her eyes from the bird.

"I'm free."

SG – SG – SG

Jack opened the front door and paused to allow Sam in first. It had been seven days since he had returned to Earth with her and two since she had fully regained consciousness. Jack had left the base the day before to take Daniella home after she had spent a night on the base with Sam. Jacob had returned as soon as he had made contact with the SGC and had the all clear to bring Daniella and Cassie home. Jack had then allowed Daniella to spend one night with the mother she had not seen in two weeks, but then took her home to Sasha for stability. Sasha, meanwhile, had no idea where Sam had been for two weeks or why Jack had been so busy at work that he had taken Daniella there. One day she was going to quit and escape the mad life Jack and Sam made her live in. He had asked Sasha to take Daniella to the park to allow Sam some time at home alone. Things could not be rushed for Sam to recover fully. He watched as she stepped into the foyer of their house and he followed, closing the door behind him. She stood there staring at everything. "You okay?"

She nodded. "Will you ever tell me what I did?"

"You didn't do anything."

She sighed and turned to him. "Will you ever tell me what it made me do?" she clarified.

He shook his head. "I hope your memories of that never come back." He truly meant it, but he still hoped that her memories from beforehand returned. He did not care that she could possibly remember things about Osiris' plans if she tried hard enough. He was putting his family first, not his job or his planet.

She smiled at him. "I might not remember what happened with Osiris, but I do remember everything up until then. I couldn't before, but I remember now. I remember fighting with you. I remember disobeying orders and going to find you on P6X 2AE."

He looked away from her, down at his feet at the memory of how stupid he had been before the clarifying conversation. He started to mumble something, unsure of what exactly he was trying to say, but he was cut off as she stepped towards him and kissed him. After a few blissful moments where his arms wrapped around her to pull her tight, he pulled his mouth away from hers. "Are you sure? Is this what you want?" he whispered.

"I want nothing more than you."

SG – SG – SG

The End.

Happy ever after?


End file.
